First I want to thank everyone for their well wishes after my post a few weeks ago about my experience of being sick. You can read more about it here. It’s so nice to feel cared about. Thank you! The good news is I’m better.
Since being sick has been such a profound experience for me, I want to share some of the insights I received.
All I wanted for 2 months was to feel better. Each day I had to relax and feel compassionate okay-ness with what was happening. Even though it’s been hard I know it’s part of a journey leading me to a greater understanding of who I am and more personal freedom.
Meditation helped me allow it to be okay. I also tapped “Even though I am mad about being so sick I am willing to let go and discover the beauty and meaning in this challenge.”
I’ve opened up the doors to dark parts of myself and I’m doing my best to feel love and compassion for the parts of me I wish would go away and never come back.
I had to let go, stop running from my own darkness and be willing to
love and accept all aspects of me.
It’s like having a big house with lots of rooms and refusing to go into some of those rooms for a long time because I was afraid of what was there. Getting sick encouraged me to go there.
It’s hard to feel disappointment, fear or disapproval and honor those feelings with kindness and compassion. But I truly believe that is the way. My Inner Being loves me and cares about me and thinks that I’m wonderful even when I am disapproving of myself.
When I am able to FEEL WHAT I FEEL with kindness and compassion I connect to my Inner Being, my True Self.
One of my favorite quotes from Abraham that really hit me is “Give up the struggle of improving yourself and accept the perfection of who you are.”
I’m beginning to realize I am not broken.
For year’s I’ve been on a quest to fix myself. But what if I’m not broken? I can forgive all the things I’m making wrong and accept myself as I am. Let myself be right. Let myself be at ease with the way I am.
What if I can feel insecure, afraid and unlovable and still love and think I’m wonderful?
I realize I am free to feel however I feel and observe myself with kindness. This includes all the feelings I don’t like. I don’t have to get rid of those parts, just let myself feel them. I am free to accept all the parts of me.
As I relax and allow my feelings to flow through me the energy transmutes.
Instead of trying to improve myself, I’m taking a softer approach. Don’t try and make anything change, don’t try and make my mind think of positive thoughts, instead accept my feelings and lighten up on myself. Care about myself deeply, like I care about my child.
This takes the layers of heaviness off of my life. Even a little shift allows the energy of the Universe to flow through me. This loving approach is a better feeling thought.
It doesn’t mean the negative feelings won’t come back. Even if they do I don’t have to resist them, or change them, just honor them. As a result I am free to be myself more fully.
I feel like I have opened up to be nicer to myself. My mantra is “Be Nicer to Yourself”
I’ve discovered when we’re nicer to ourselves we have an I’m on the right track attitude, I’m a good person feeling. We ease up on the demands we make on ourselves. We don’t have to try so hard to make things happen. We let the Universe surprise and delight us. We relax into an attitude of goodness.
I like the feeling of my inner being. I like recognizing and feeling the love Source has for me. I’m doing all right. I can relax and allow my energy to flow.
I’m glad I am feeling oh-so-much better.
I hope this information is helpful to you. We are all in this together.
I am grateful for my new awareness. I believe whatever is showing up is there for us, not against us. I now use these insights regularly on my journey.
Much Love & Hugs,
Ingrid
